Source : Voice of Seoul
There’s a new mysterious illness sweeping through society. It’s not listed in any medical textbook, yet it appears on the news almost every day. The name? Pre-Arrest Syndrome.
This isn’t your typical flu or virus. It’s a peculiar condition that seems to affect only a very specific group of people — politicians, celebrities, tycoons, and religious leaders — right before they face arrest.
Symptom #1: Sudden Health Collapse
The first sign of Pre-Arrest Syndrome is a dramatic, almost theatrical decline in health the moment news breaks about a possible arrest warrant.
A perfectly healthy person who was hiking mountains last weekend suddenly shows up in a wheelchair, claiming excruciating back pain.
Someone who was recently indulging in five-star meals now insists they “can’t even swallow porridge.”
And in the most extreme cases, people appear before the cameras hooked up to oxygen tanks and IV drips, like they’re on the brink of death.
It’s as if their bodies are staging a protest to convince the judge to deny the arrest warrant.
Symptom #2: Selective Onset
This syndrome has one unique feature — its timing is incredibly selective.
When it’s time for a luxury golf trip, a high-profile gala, or a political rally, these individuals are perfectly fine, walking around without a problem.
But the moment they receive a summons from the prosecutor, their legs mysteriously give out.
A journalist might ask:
“Just two days ago, you were playing in a tennis match. Today, you’ve arrived in a wheelchair. What happened?”
The patient, eyes closed, whispers faintly:
“Back then... it was only my heart that hurt.
Now... my body hurts too.”
Symptom #3: The Miracle Cure — Arrest Denied
Here’s where it gets even stranger: there is a miracle cure for Pre-Arrest Syndrome.
The cure is called “arrest warrant denied.”
The instant a judge rejects the arrest warrant, the patient jumps out of the wheelchair and walks away waving to reporters.
Hospital stays that were expected to last weeks end abruptly with a same-day discharge.
The wheelchair? Quietly shoved into a corner like an old prop.
Even doctors are left scratching their heads:
“There’s no scientific explanation for this.
Perhaps the power of the dismissal unblocks the patient’s energy pathways.”
Rapid Spread Among the Powerful
Pre-Arrest Syndrome spreads most effectively among the elite: politicians, business magnates, high-profile entertainers, and religious figures.
The pattern is always the same:
As investigations heat up, symptoms intensify.
When the legal threat disappears, full recovery happens overnight.
This strange phenomenon has grown so widespread that people joke about how courthouses might soon need ambulances on standby because they resemble hospitals more than courts of law.
Prevention: Don’t Fall for the Performance
There’s no vaccine or medicine for this syndrome yet.
The best prevention is public awareness — recognizing that these displays of sudden illness are usually just performances.
If citizens refuse to be fooled, the syndrome loses its power.
Final Thoughts
Pre-Arrest Syndrome isn’t a physical disease.
It’s a symptom of moral decay and a mirror reflecting how deeply compromised the rule of law has become.
One day, we hope to see a time when courthouses are filled not with wheelchairs and staged ailments, but with honesty, accountability, and true justice. Until then, Pre-Arrest Syndrome will remain a tragic — and darkly comedic — part of our public life.
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